Sunday, 25 August 2013

Clean up bears!

So if you remember that sweet picture my darling baby bear drew for me, I decided to show everyone because It's the only nice one I have. Papa bear and Baby bear are always making a mess-
"Baby bear, put that down! We are guests in this swamp!"
You see? I don't even know where papa is! When we're at home, I'm always cleaning up after them. When we're visiting people I try to stop the messes from happening. What's a mama to do? My weekly tea is the only thing that keeps me sane and ever since the wicked witch told me how she really feels, I've been having tea with the mad hatter when I have the time. Try staying sane around that one! That Shrek had better get back here soon or I'm going to go stir crazy!

Wednesday, 21 August 2013



Isn't that just the cutest picture? Baby bear drew this picture of me before Farquaad banished us all. Papa bear thinks it looks like a sun burnt hamster in a pink apron but I think it's beautiful. My baby bear is so talented! Such a shame Farquaad felt a need to banish the little ones along with everyone else. Besides, not everyone here is a freak. I mean personally, there are days I wouldn't be opposed to leaving Gingy, Pinocchio or the pigs here but that wouldn't be right. No matter how annoying they can be, they're not freaks (again I find the issue of Pinocchio.) Although even the ones that are, arguably freaks are pretty nice creatures. Farquaad had no right to banish us! And couldn't he have at least banished us somewhere nicer?
That's all from Mama bear today.

Friday, 28 June 2013

Down with Farquaad

It's mama bear here!
I can't believe Farquaad would be so mean as to dump us all on this swamp! I'm going to be cleaning for the rest of my life. At least when that little Goldilocks brat was hanging around we still had our house! She was so annoying! Every time she came over it was the same "This one is too big! This one is too small! This one is juuust right!" Why did she have to always take my things? And then every time we came home she told us that we were freaks. just because we can talk it doesn't make us freaks! Besides, I'm proud to be a freak! It's who I am! Goldilocks got to stay in the kingdom. That's just not fair. If Farquaad had any sense, she would be the one out here, not us! Oh and all those stories about us, the ones that say we bears are such great friends with Goldilocks? Lies! All lies! Farquaad made all those stories up about the fairytale creatures so that when he told everyone we were freaks, they would believe him! Now, no one cares about all the innocent freaks and fruitcakes their precious Lord Farquaad dumped on a swamp. The big bad wolf? Yeah, he's a big bad softie. The wicked witch, is the nicest witch I know! We go out for tea together occasionally.
Lord Farquaad has to be put in his place. If it takes a bunch of freaks, then so be it.